Newsletters

Katie, aged 40 (a contributor to this newsletter), shared:

“My mom was a toy industry executive, breaking glass ceilings. I got good grades and excelled at sports while swimming competitively throughout high school. Perfection wasn’t just something I wanted, it was something I chased.

At 16, preparing for my first party, I wanted to be the best drinker. I drank a pint of bourbon, and after the third sip, the radio in my head, usually at full volume, went quiet. I could breathe, until I blacked out and hit my head. From that day, I used alcohol to silence the voices in my head.

I went to a Division I college, got A’s, and joined the swim team, where I had success until an injury. Self-doubt crept in as my desire to succeed faded. I went out every night, drinking heavily, until a ‘friend’ introduced me to cocaine.

Over the decade, I was in and out of rehab. Cocaine became crack, and I would do anything for it. While alcohol made my head quiet, crack made it all go away.

In 2013, while living in Texas, I met the man who would become the father of my children. In 2015, we had a son, and in 2017, our daughter. I stopped using drugs but leaned into alcohol.

In July 2018, I turned to Alcoholics Anonymous and found three years and seven months of sobriety. But when I stopped going to meetings, talking to my sponsor, and doing the work, I relapsed. The cycle returned: drinking, sober.

In 2022, my sponsor brought me to a meeting at Helping Up Mission’s Women’s Program at Chase Street. A few months later, I entered the program. The first time, I stayed for two months. I loved it, but my children needed me. In 2024, after a brutal relapse, I reentered the Spiritual Recovery Program.

Before, my life was a circle I couldn’t escape. Sometimes I still want to escape my brain like 16-year-old me. But I’ve learned to face challenges head-on and be honest about where I stand. Because of the work I put in, I graduated from the program and have been hired as the Operations Coordinator.

This Mother’s Day, I want to be fully present with my children, letting my overactive perfection brain not determine the day. Along this journey, I’ve found something I never had before: real, authentic love. Not just from others, but within myself, and in the kind of relationship I once thought wasn’t possible for me. Recovery didn’t give me a perfect life. It gave me a real one.

Life doesn’t look the way I once imagined, but today it’s honest, grounded, and full of purpose. I thank God I made it through the worst to show my children what strength looks like, and to remind other women that their story can help set someone else free.

I am deeply grateful for the resources and donors. Because of you, this program saved my life. I found the courage to do the hard things.”

To read the full newsletter, click here.